study blog break...

One thing about writing is, there's a lot of unnecessary pressure that goes into it. I don't think I'm a great writer. I'm alright, but not great. Sometimes, when my wit factor is especially low, I will just not write at all, at least not anything that anyone will read. But I'll journal. I'll lazily pour pages of apathetic musings, knowing that it's only me who'll read it. I'm not feeling too witty tonight, but tonight I am writing a blog.

And do you know what? I don't have anything new to say. I don't mean since the last blog, I mean, I have nothing new to add to the world. I used to think that was a great reason to never write at all. But I read in a great book that there is nothing new under the sun, and I don't think that means that we should just sit around and not create. Sometimes Grace, the girl I nanny, and I try to add something to the world that has never been there before. I think I got this from a movie, but I can't remember. So we'll do a crazy dance, or make up a word or a face, and just, add it. What she doesn't realize is, in a sense everything that we do is new. This is the first time anyone has ever sat in the chair I'm sitting in (which is really uncomfortable) with their feet up on the counter and their broken binder in front of them (I need a new binder) writing for a blog called somewhat abbynormal. In a sense, yes, nothing is new under the sun, but maybe in the same way that this is new, old things that are said and written need to be said fresh and written fresh.

I learned this semester that we are creative. Maybe I should say, I learned this semester that you are creative. Every single human, made in the image of the Creator, is creative and should do something about it. We shouldn't be exalting the precious few artsy people we know, we should be celebrating their gifts and making use of our own! Is it writing? Is it painting? Is it baking for a friend, or making a room look nice? Is it planning a fun date for your wife? Creativity shouldn't stress us out. That reminds me of a funny story. I had a friend that had a panic attack once when her boyfriend planned this artsy date in which he bought canvas and paints for them to use. It was kind of a riot. Most girls would swoon, she hyperventilated at the idea of having to paint something. But actually, this was a good thing. She knew herself well, and really hates painting. But she is actually one of the most creative people I know. She is constantly pouring into girls lives, looking for ways to serve her husband (yes, she married the guy), caring for her family in new ways, etc. It blesses me so.

On that note, the God of the Bible is the most beautiful Being I have ever been aware of. I know that sounds abstract, but I don't know how else to say it. Tonight, I'll be honest, He feels a bit far away. But that's okay, I have promises that assure me otherwise. Have you read the Bible lately? That God... wow. Loving, wooing, judging (in the old, good and noble sense of the word), fighting, pursuing, creating, rejoicing, grieving, redeeming. Yes, the Bible is a hard book. There are stories that don't make sense. Read it anyways. Fall in love.

I suppose that's all I have to say for tonight. In 5 days I will be done with finals. My mind is so tired, I can't believe I'm awake right now. My heart is also very tired. It is not troubled, actually, it's rather quieted at the moment. But tired, and needing a rest. It will come soon!

God, let this letter bless those who read it. Let my life, and tonight, count for eternity. Give us the grace to lift our eyes to the heavens. You are King. Amen